To Be or Not to Be

This WordPress.com site is a work in progress

Welcome

ahhh-moment.jpg 

 

…to the musings of me. Now that doesn’t sound too appealing you say? and that’s ok. This is my first time too, is it yours? A  ha, I’ve caught your eye! Wow what the imagination can spark…as she smiles modestly. Just a quick spy through the looking glass then…this is my most english accent which probably doesn’t make any sense.

None the less here we are at the beginning of what looks like a marvelous ride. One of carousel coutures, picturesque scenes of how to’s, has beens and everything in between. Poetry and prose, maybe even a journal or two to disclose. Yes, I’ve been an avid journal writer for some time, I guess that’s what led me here to share. Writing is just one of those things that comes naturally for me especially if it’s a rant or a rave. Jane of all trades, I am; well at least that of the artsy type. Sometimes turning trash into treasure or starting from scratch. Usually the “template” idea of project is always there, and eventually you see the creation take shape. Just like doing the hokey pokey, you won’t find out until you put one foot in and shake it all about.

Speaking of hokey pokey, that’s another part of me, the procrastinator procreator to a T! Yep, I said it, I went there. Time management and I love to do this dance, this dance of who, what , where, when, why and how. It took me awhile to complete the zero to hero daily challenges last year. Hence, I’ve concluded that’s one of my quirks. I did eventually finish them.

I welcome you to check out my blog from time to time, if not, that’s quite alright too. I will be, like the headline says “a work in progress” to this site and hope to have fun doing so.  So far, so good, I like what I see and can’t wait to meet you too! Soooo delighted to be a part of this community and look forward to learning more new things from all of you.

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Get it

They just don’t get it
just don’t understand
the creative process
of using both hands

Don’t judge thee…
of my imagination;creation
only support me
whatever I may choose to be

Choose to be…in my mindscapes…free
the altered reality
Perstephanie..perplexing, yet simplicity.

~by Ruby Thompson~

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Valentine’s Day~Round up activity

Valentines Day

A day of love post by Write Meg! , yes with Valentine’s day still Freshly Pressed in our minds, I decided to catch up to the rest of the blogging world. It felt like a while since I had put pen to thought, or is it thought to pen? Well, I had my own ideas how my next post should sound and look, however that’s not what happened. I ventured to check out all the handpicked highlights from Freshly Pressed and that is where I met  a Boy with a Hat (blog I recently followed). He had me pondering on things I love and the meaning of LOVE itself. I bet you never knew Married ladies can have crushes, too post by Write Meg! , whoa you say that doesn’t sound right. Ahhh, honey don’t worry it’s a sign from above we have a good ole “book” crush from time to time we just love. To my valentine’s surprise; book reviews for thine eyes. Its lovely writing at its best. That’s got to be something to love, laugh and live about, yet still questioning our own validity in this vast written world. Love knows no limits. Let’s not limit ourselves to the written word but to allow a great Fusion:The Synergy of Images and Words to entice our imaginations. Words mixed with picturesque media content to reveal all that could be. To take us from ‘Inside These Walls’ by Rebecca Coleman(review by Write Meg!), to other mindsets of the world.

I guess love could be viewed as evidenced by Dear Followers. It is many things to many walks of life, All Creatures Great and Small by It Takes Two~blog on Photography. This inspired that lovin feeling….oooohh that lovin feeling. It reminded me of fresh new love as portrayed  in Photo Essay of Couples Around the World. Around and around we go, Love is ….what makes the world go round. It definitely takes you to a whole different place. Not just in your heart, but mind,body and soul; of love’s lost but not forgotten. You don’t give up, the Boy with a Hat encourages hope, hope for the love lorn. I wonder if The Romance of Our Shadow knows?

People, places and things these are a few of my favorite things! Ah but the love of writing, puts a voice to the face, The Boy with a Hat had me questioning whether I preferred handwriting over typing in Are You a Handwriter or a Typer? which posed yet another deeper question,Are You a Writer?. So to answer those questions, yes I think I am a writer of sorts, I’ve arrived here! Well to be honest creating this post had me doing both, and then some. Whew, if you only knew, my notebooks of scribblings and after thoughts strewn all over the floor.

Just ask the Boy with a Hat,9 Signs That You are Becoming a Writer, imagine that.  All this and more, wow what a lot of good reads indeed. But, I didn’t stop there I wanted to Write Meg some more but took a walk on the wild side of love instead. Photography by It Takes Two was a breath of fresh air and by that I mean inspiration galore for me to write some more.

It seemed I was on a roll for more interesting finds that added to the hot topic of Love. You see people and animals like that special bond, a fondness of things, passionate and endearing. Loving of self, others and things all rolled into one. That’s what makes us all unique and loving in our own quirky ways. We love to paint, sing, read, and ski. We love to travel, photograph, write and watch t.v. Our love extends beyond ourselves, especially to those we least expect, this is how we affect.

So, I bid you adieu and hope you enjoyed my little review. Those highlighted reads were inspiring, funny, tragic, and moving. A little bit of something for everyone to love.

Recommended

*Write Meg! ~ another take on writing,reading,loving and reading blog
*BOY WITH A HAT ~ musings,poetry, and stories blog
*Steve Mc Curry’s blog ~photography blog

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First Kiss

almostshadow

First Kiss

Journal writing is far more reminiscent of jovial times, when young adolescents dance with delight at the thought of that “first kiss’. The tingling sensation from every inch of their bodies as they nervously touch the other to whom their caresses arouse all the senses. Each one anticipating how it will feel, the sweet taste of each other while their pounding heart thunders loudly in their ears. A wondrous time of awaking that can hardly be contained into one single moment. Subtle cues given to signal advancement of the next phase.

They wish and wait patiently until they can see each other again, as if every waking moment depended on it. What is it that excites them, controls their desires and wanting their fantasies to come true. He looks at her with wonder and amazement all the while not knowing what she is all about. Studying her face and the gestures it makes, with every spoken word and smile. If only he could just reach over and kiss her supple soft lips as he dreamed about so many times before. To part her hair down the side of her cheek as he gazes into her eyes. He’s got her attention and she starts to respond in sweet subtle way. She glances at him and stares into his eyes looking feverishly at his lips. She wants to lean in towards him and feel the embrace, but plays shy for just a while longer. She blushes as his fingertips softly caress her cheek, hardly able to contain the excitement swelling inside her. This brief fleeting moment seems to last forever with each one of them trying to guess who will make the first move.

There is an interruption from friends joining their fun and they dispel anything that may be going on. She is still blushing on the inside and wonders if it shows. She tries to compose herself in a manner that hides her aspirations. He too, backs away trying to conceal his denying urge to pull her close to him. They glance at each other knowing that they must wait for another time and place. Is it the plight of flirtation that takes them to the next level of heightened ecstasy or their own imaginations of desires beyond themselves? It’s the thrill of wondering what each of them will do next to make that moment of truth real in their minds, the ultimate kiss, that first kiss.

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I like her because…

her reputation precedes her.

What is reputation anyways?
Someone else’s perceived version of who they think WE ought to be…

Reputation: recognition by other people of some characteristic or ability; overall quality of character as seen as judged by people in general; a place in public esteem or regard: good nameDo I have a reputation…hmmm that is the question? I guess maybe we all do, and probably our perception of it is indeed altered. Often we think we are one way as opposed to what others may seem to think about us. Sometimes we are immobilized by the “reputation” because it commands that we live by “it”. It can be a measure of how we are  to be(have) in today’s societal views. Other times it can be used as a driving force for some of today’s biggest achievements and demise of our time. Maybe its a semi form of our alter ego, that presents itself whenever it deems the time is right. I have to LOL on that last comment, because it sounds a bit split personality(ish). Okay, I know that is not a word but realistically speaking sometimes reputations can be misconstrued.

Real Story #1
(the names have been changed to protect the innocent and guilty)

New Year’s Eve

You know how people interact with each other of the opposite sex and you also know very well that if you factor in alcohol well the cocktail of the evening can be one of fanciful flight or just a kick in the a**…sorry had to bleep that out.

Short story put, one thing leads to another, drink after drink and let’s not forget prank after prank. All in fun you say, well depends on who’s having the fun and at who’s expense? Don’t get me wrong I played along, until I saw that it was no longer fun. Time to leave a new year had begun.

New Year’s Day

Oh what a night…still ringin in the New Year in my head, but somehow it seems louder today than last night. Tequila(to-kill-ya)shot,shot,shots. I go back to bed and rest my weary head, all day long just coasting in and out of what seemed like unconsciousness. This is what hangovers are like,note to self, don’t ever do this again. It isn’t until 5pm later that day that I decide to call my neighbor(Shelby)to check on her. She was pretty looped last nite and was worried when we left her. Thankfully we cleaned up the vomit off herself and put her to bed.

I notice her mother’s car in the driveway as I proceed to call. Her mother(Jenna) and I had become quite close friends over the past few years. Jenna answered the phone with a flurry of questions and accusations of character. I didn’t know what to think or how to answer, I was stunned, totally utterly stunned.

Conclusion of this story; based on the past reputation of certain individuals, sometimes that what they have done or not done remains ingrained in the brains of those who refuse to see beyond past mistakes or to take the person’s recollection of the truth at face value. No willingness to listen to what the other has to say, because your mind is already made up from the partial facts given.

Jenna and I have ended our friendship and the newer friendship with her daughter Shelby had ended as well. Of course it got messy with social media Facebook slurs and slanders, and extended to my family and friends of mutual interest. Naturally I got pissed, and wanted to tell my side of what happened that night. I wanted a reprieve, I wanted her to believe. Why, I can’t remember now, I probably did then, o yeah could it be reputation, you say. Writing is one of my passions so to this I took, writing two letters not sent and a poem in response to how I felt. I lost what I thought was friends, but gained a bit of knowledge and understanding of worth in the end.

Poem ~ Friendz No More By Ruby Thompson
Read more
Lessons Learned

don’t always believe all that you hear and only half of what you see
there must be a reason and season for things to end
Trying to prove that you are right is pointless to people with closed off minds

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HEALth in mind

think
Temper is the #1 thing you can’t get rid of by losing it

No matter how you feel.
Get up, dress up, show up
and never give Up
~Regina Brett~
Another day to make a difference in this world and what happens I think I might have blown it. How could I have managed that?Probably had to do with my attitude towards someone else’s stuff. That’s right, I said it, someone else’s stuff!. I for one have been hibernating but thought I better get in to see the Nurse Practitioner for my annual check in. Health Inclined, HEALth in mind that’s exactly it, that’s the ticket! I’m not an expert in the medical field, only having worked in it for several years, but I do know this.
nurse

Why then on this Mental Health awareness day of all days, do you find yourself inclined to treat me this way. I had some things written down to help me remember what I needed to share. You say to me “You only have half an hour for your visit, so pick two of the most important things on your list. We don’t have enough time to go through all of it today.” Cut to the chase, I’m feeling displaced. Wow! It just hit me like a slap in the face, with a tone so cold and uncaring,it left a bitter taste. Is it possible, you too are having a bad day?

to nurse

I did not realize I was interrupting your day. Just give me what I need and I’ll be on my way. When I tell you what’s wrong, that something isn’t right, just listen to me! How can you continue to interrogate me with questions of query, trying to answer them ever so quickly is making me weary. I start to think, “why did I come?”. Then this wave of uneasiness, anxiety, and grief start to come over me and then I can’t speak or think. Is that part of it…not being on the meds? Speaking of meds, I tell you I stopped them and you look at me with eyes that despise. Was it the last statement that broke our client/clinician link? What do you think?

“The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right place, but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment” ~Dorothy Nevill

My expectations of this visit turning to sour milk, it’s no wonder I don’t like the taste. All the same questions and repeated tests, that left me feeling worse than when I came in.  Accusing tones of voice while forcing my ligaments, limbs and joints. Doubting my insight of my own body and mind. Really you weren’t very kind. Your medical books say “I’m too young” to be experiencing “this” or is “this” your own personal reality to it? Shouldn’t you have a list of symptoms to share with your clients for cases just like “this”.

“Be an Encourager.The world has plenty of critics already”. DaveWillis.org

As much as I wanted to get upset and angry I kept my cool. I answered your questions accordingly as best as I could. I  tried to understand what was happening to me and didn’t feel very good. It was like you didn’t want to take the time to look,learn and listen, to try  help me out even if you could. You give me a quick reprieve with a requisition for the lab and x-ray. “This should suffice” you say, “do these first and then we’ll see” as you show me on my way. She really doesn’t believe me!

“Don’t allow your wounds to transform you into someone you are not”  www.thedailyquotes.com

I wish I had abided by the above quote when I left your office and on my way home; I did just the opposite and groaned. But I didn’t stop there I continued on until everyone, and I mean everyone heard my plight. Which of course made me wanna fight. A phone call, a letter; something to spite.I thought of all the things I could have said to stand up for myself and left it to social networking instead.

sarcasm

Hence the appointment to check up on a healthy brain.I guess my lessons are these:

  • trust yourself to know yourself
  • you are your own best HEALer
  • find alternative therapies  that suit you or get a second opinion
  • when the message you send out is not the message received that is miscommunication
  • train your mind to see the good in every situation

And so it is with parting wisdom that I share this;

yesterday

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Wide eyed wisdom

Hello blogosphere, I am here, well in script anyways. I am slowly catching up on my 30 days to a better blogger challenge. With that being said, I find myself, wandering onto other blogs and reading to my heart’s content. Then I realise that I haven’t written a single entry. I am on day 12 of the challenges and have made changes to profile, followed other bloggers, liked their blogs and even commented on a few. So much so that I re-blogged “lesson on being human from a 3 year old” by everyday gurus. I didn’t realise at first that it would appear on the top of my page, but all the credit is owed to Kozo Hatorri for his wonderful insight.
Speaking of such, I can totally relate to learning from children, from the tiniest baby onwards. They instinctively have a knowing that is out of this world, only because “our” world has become eluded and deluded to the point of pulp sometimes. They really have a way of bringing you into the present moment, they never miss a beat. Yet when we stand corrected, we think its child’s play to listen to what they have to say. How can we expect them to act a certain way when we don’t act accordingly. Expectations are a huge demand on anybody really when you think about it

Their understanding of the world is loving and pure, unscathed and untouched by the scruples of humanity or should I say society. I like the way they give us a break, a break to be ourselves and indeed take time to play. For them playing is learning, where we often find ourselves learning to play again. I wonder what its like inside their minds, ever-changing as the days go by. Each experiencing the world as it unfolds before them.

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Beauty

BeautyBeauty is in the eye of the beholder….hmmm is it really?

With all of today’s fad diets,quick get slim fixes,and toxin cleansing how is anyone to know what’s the right one for them. Let’s not forget about the gym/fitness videos, memberships and equipment out there for you. It’s mind-boggling and time – consuming to try figure out what works for you. I’m thinking if we’re not all built the same then why would a one quick fix be right for everyone?

I for one have not been one of those fad diet guru’s, however I do believe in healthy living and all that goes with that. As I get older it does make me wonder if some of the treatment regimes would benefit me now in helping me to age gracefully…cough,choke on my coffee right now. I did decide to take better care of me in every way possible. I guess I’m one of those people who like to take things in stride nowadays.

JanYOUary is always a new promise of a new start to a new year…a new you!Whichever way, shape or form that may take. Here’s a quote note from Audrey Hepburn on Beauty…

Audrey Hepburn wrote when asked to share her “beauty tips.”
It was read at her funeral years later.

For attractive lips, speak words of wisdom.
For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.
For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry.
For beautiful hair, let a child run his/her fingers through it once a day.
For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone.
People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone.
Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you will find one at the end of each of your arms.
As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands;
one for helping yourself, and the other for helping others.

~Audrey Hepburn~

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Lovin it

Day 5 assignment, however my 4th post, how can this be? Well here goes a change to see what else there is to see

So I checked out themes and it’s that first instinct that gets me almost every time and when it doesn’t grab my attention, I usually regret it later.
The first theme I looked at, the Spirit theme and hence as you can see I changed it up! It really didn’t take me long; I guess you could say “it spoke to me”.
My next few previews didn’t turn out as well and really didn’t speak to me. Some of them wouldn’t load, and how could they with an outdated browser, computer etc. After checking out a few other themes like Flounder,Chateau,Mixfolio and Crafty. I realized I need to update my equipment in order to have a better blogging experience. I did, however keep some themes in mind for later blogs. So it is with great pleasure that I cut this assignment short in order to catch up with the other ones. I’m loving my new theme and who knows maybe tomorrow, next week or next month I may change it up again.

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Who are the people in your neighborhood?

Progress so far:
Day 1 so excited, a bit confused and maybe just a wee bit over zealous to say the least. Day 2 and 3 assignments easy, peasy, pudding and pie. However leave it to me to make a mountain out of a molehill. Here’s a short blurb of what I like to call
“day 2 of setup”.
Second day and having difficulty with uploading of gravatar. I was really looking forward to taking the zero-to-hero 30 days to a better blog challenge to help walk me through. It seems like so much to write about…so little time. Ah ha, I’ve found it…now take me there. So much to learn and take in all at once. Thank goodness I’m one of those self-taught learners…oh there we go, I’ve found the site “3,2,1…BLOG!zero to hero Starts now”.Whew that was a whirlwind

Naming my blog and editing the tagline was a quick task, so quick I came up with many more. I did have fun trying to write “about” this blog. The past few days have been refreshing and inspiring.
Here are some of the people in your neighborhood…
http://ppm4u.wordpress.com
http://fivethingsatonce.com, http://skirtastop.com, http://morningstoryanddilbert.com
I enjoyed them and wanted to read more. I read two more blogs http://pankisseskafka.com, http://annaleventhal.com/2013/12/22Other-Girls

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